Naruto: King of the Kitsune
by Cujo T
Summary: A five-year-old Naruto is taken on a 7 year long training trip by the Kyuubi, who also happens to be female. NaruXFemKyuubi, possibly harem if readers want it. Chapter Four out, you lucky gits.
1. Chapter 1

'Have to run, need to run, cannot stop running, _they_ will get me!'

These, and other, similar, thoughts, were the only thoughts running through a 5 year old Naruto's mind. Current the young blonde child known as Naruto was running, or rather being chased, through one of the seedier parts of the Konohagakure no Kuni, the Village Hidden in the Leaves, where murder, theft, and rape was far more common than in the richer districts.

**'Useless brat, why was I sealed in such a weak vessel? I swear, even Nibi got a semi-useful bint, but what do I get? A malnourished ramen-addicted freak stuck in a retardedly prejudiced village.'** These were the thoughts running through the Kyuubi's mind. **'Fuck this, I need to do _something_ before this dumb-ass gets killed...' "OI GAKI!"** That last bit was spoken into the poor child's mind. Naruto, of course, automatically assumed it was some form of Genjutsu and attempted to dispel it.

"KAI!" Obviously, this had no effect, but the Lord of the Demons, the Foxes, and the Demon Foxes did not appreciate being 'KAI'ed so he shouted a bit louder: **"OI YOU IDIOT CHILD QUIT FUCKING RUNNING AND HIDE SOMEWHERE!"**

Naruto was better than some ANBU at dispelling Genjutsu so he decided that if the Chuunin Kurenai, who was from a long line of Genjutsu users and thus infinitely better at them than he was, was attempting to manipulate him, for good or for bad, he may as well do what she said and made his way to a warehouse he knew was safe.

The warehouse in question was, for all intents and purposes, non-existent. It had so many layers of Ninjutsu and Genjutsu, not to mention some severely potent Fuuinjutsu, he only happened across it by chance when he was cornered in an alley.

"**The only reason you know of this place is because I told you, kid. You only got through the protections because of the demon blood in you."**

"So I am a demon then?"

"**No, the retarded villagers only say that because I'm sealed in you. 5 years ago that idiot Madara cast a Genjutsu on me to try and make me give him all my power but it backfired and I tried to destroy your village. The Yondaime, coincidentally your father, gave his life to seal me in you. He _wanted_ you to be seen as a hero but the villagers needed a scapegoat. Also, you only need to think things for me to hear them"**

"Okay--" 'Err, okay then... So why did you bring me here?'

"**The reason why I had you come here is... Actually, do me a favour and perform this technique please."** With that 7 seals popped into Naruto's mind, the first six of which were normal ninja seals and the final was a strange one he had never seen before, the pinky of the right hand pushed over the pinky of the left hand and held over the bottom knuckle of the index, middle, and ring fingers, the index of the right hand wrapped around the thumb of the left, and the index of the left held between the middle and ring fingers of the right hand, with the pinky of the left hand peering out between the index and thumb of the right hand ([_A/N I only described it since it'll be used again. It's the Kyuubi's special seal, if you count the visible digits there are nine of them. All the demon bosses have their own seals_]). Performing the seals and shouting, though he didn't know the technique, Onijutsu: Onibunshin. A rather subdued puff of smoke followed, which compressed into a woman, 5 feet 9 inches tall, dressed in a black trench coat that went directly to the floor and a wide-brimmed fedora that shadowed most of her face.

"**MUCH better, being stuck in your stomach all the time is annoying."** were the first words spoken by the woman. Naruto panicked and moved to cancel the jutsu, but was interrupted. **"Gaki, don't worry about it. I can't actually go more than 5 feet away from you in this form without your permission."** To demonstrate, she took a few large steps to the left, then dropped dead of a heart attack once she got about 5 and a quarter feet away. Naruto took a step towards her and she came back to life. **"See? Now I only brought you here so I could train you a bit, but there really isn't enough space. Do you trust me?"**

"Not really," replied Naruto, "Why?"

"**That's a good thing to hear. I want to take you on a nice trip around the country, possibly out of the mortal realm, but simply vanishing will put you on the missing-nin list since you have ninja training, so we'll need to go to your Hokage and ask him for leave for the next... Let's say 7 years. Do you want to do it?"**

'Hmm, stay in a village where I'm hated and might end up dead in a month or get trained by an insanely powerful, not to mention pretty, demon lord. Hard choice.' "HELL YES I DO!"

"**That is a good thing. You don't know any teleportation jutsu so here are the signs for the demon one:"** she said, followed by doing two seals Naruto didn't recognize. **"It isn't possible for mortals to do it though, so just come here and I'll do it for us."**

Naruto, not seeing any harm in doing so, let her take him to the Hokage's office.

The Hokage in question was fairly surprised to see them, especially the Kyuubi. In fact, he was so surprised he dropped the Icha Icha Tactics novel he was reading and hit the Third Division ANBU button so hard it shot through the roof. Naruto, seriously shocked, jumped onto the ceiling which caused the Kyuubi to drop of a heart attack while an entire division of ANBU Shushined into the Hokage's office.

"Naruto, why is the Kyuubi walking around outside of your body?" queried the Sandaime.

"That's a long story, and I will tell it to you when those ANBU quit shooting glares at Kyuubi-san and I get off the ceiling." With that, the Hokage dismissed the ANBU and Naruto, true to his word, dropped off the ceiling, reviving the Kyuubi who was suitably pissed.

"**Hokage-san, we need to talk. ALONE."** The Hokage was worried but he dismissed Naruto, who gave Kyuubi permission to be a bit away from him.

"**Sarutobi, I want to take Naruto on a training trip for the next seven years. He is pitifully weak and I fear for his, and thus my, life. Just half an hour ago he was being chased by nearly 500 villagers, for crying out loud!"**

"Yeah, about that..-"

"**Don't give me that shit, you know full well you can do something about it. Regardless, do I have your permission to take Naruto out of the country, and possibly even this realm?"**

Sarutobi weighed it in his head. 'Kyuubi has a point, even if I start executing everyone who even looks at Naruto funny I'll just end up the Hokage of a dead town, plus if this works out I'll have the most powerful ninja in several centuries as one of my ninja, I might as well let them go.' "Very well, you have my leave."

"**Brilliant! We'll be back in 7 years."**

* * *

_A/N so this is my new story. It'll get better I swear._

_I'm actually going to cover most, if not all, of the training, unlike SOME people who only cover it through flashbacks "coughcoughkarrafearcoughcough" :D_

_To all y'all who read my HP story that series is too boring and retarded now that I've read Twilight and have had my Consumer Reading gland forcefully removed, so I abandoned it. If anyone wants to take it up feel free. _


	2. Chapter 2

Key:

'human thoughts'

"human speech"

**'demon thoughts, powerful'**

"**powerful demon speech"**

_'celestial being thoughts'_

"_celestial speech"_

'Summon thoughts'

"summon speech "

* * *

"So we're going training." Naruto asked.

"**Yes."** Kyuubi's response.

"Out of the village."

"**Yes."**

"For the next seven years."

"**Yes."**

"... Cool, when do we leave?"

"**Now is as good a time as any. Cancel the jutsu, it must be draining on your chakra reserves severely."**

Naruto cancelled the jutsu and set off towards the gate.

* * *

"**Okay kit, I absolutely refuse to train you while you're so infinitely weak. I think we're going to need to go to the realm of the Kitsune, but to do that you need to be at least hanyou **_([half-demon but anyone reading Naruto fan fiction should know that =/)]_ **so I'll need to turn you."** **'Kami, I haven't turned anyone since... No, that was over a thousand years ago, I shouldn't think of him any more'**

'So how do we do that then?'

"**First, you need to give me a body; the Onibunshin **_([demon clone, basically])_** should probably be sufficient."**

Naruto did as he was told, with the disturbingly pretty demon lord coming into existence before him.

"What next?"

"**Now, you need to make a gash in your arm from the elbow to the wrist. Don't worry, I'll heal it."**

Naruto did as he was told, retrieving a kunai from his pouch and barely flinching slicing his arm. Looking at the Kyuubi for further instructions he was surprised to see her do the same thing to the bottom of her arm.

"**Okay, now this is going to hurt worse than anything you've ever felt, or so I'm told."**

Pressing her arm to Naruto's, she began letting a large amount of chakra roll out of her arm tenketsu in such amounts that it was visible. 'Wait, isn't normal chakra blue?' were the last coherent thoughts on Naruto's mind, which was then blanked due to an amount of pain comparable to being disembowelled by several rusty wooden spoons.

* * *

When Naruto came to the sun was inexplicably further east. Either he went back in time slightly or went forward in time significantly, the latter of which was rather more likely. Kyuubi, noticing he was awake, stated: **"Oh, good, you're awake. I took the liberty of taking you to the Hi no Kuni border while you were out."**

Indeed he was located at the border, which was rather lacking in notability other than that there was nearly no grass or trees. Indeed it looked for all intents and purposes as though they were in Hidden Sand village, which was rumoured to be constantly embattled by a large sandstorm from all sides. Indeed, Naruto could see the Hidden Sand village only 200 miles or so away. 'Wait, what? My vision is good but 1,056,000**:20 vision is unheard of.' **

"Kyuubi-sensei, is there a reason why I can see a village about 200 miles away from where we are?"

"**Yes, that would be because you're a half-demon now. Also, since I'm the one who turned you you have about 5 tail's worth of power. If I was _smart_ I would have withheld a bit of power but I misjudged it slightly since I've only ever done this once before. We have a huge amount of training ahead of us. In fact, look downwards for a second would you?"**

Naruto did that, wondering why, until he noticed he was about 7 feet off the ground.

"Either I'm in a tree, which I'm not, or I am seven feet tall. Kyuubi-san, which is it?"

"**Hehe, that'd be the latter. You should also be able to transform to a kitsune, but doing that right now would be a bad idea. Now is as good a time as any to go to the realm of the kitsune, and since you _are_ now a hanyou you should be able to use demonic teleportation, which also allows crossing realms. It's demi-hebi demi-tora, and to go to one of the demon realms, when you're in human mode at least, you need to bite your thumb. While you complete the last seal think strongly of a fox and put in a nice amount of chakra, which you have a huge amount of now."**

Naruto did such as he was told, and ended up spinning disconcertedly. The realm of the kitsune was actually rather more pleasant than he was expecting, indeed it was as close to heaven as he was going to get. There were literal rivers of milk and honey for crying out loud! Everywhere he turned there were foxes with various numbers of tails running and playing in the lush fields of green. The sights, sounds, and smells were overwhelming, especially since he also had the senses of a demon. 'After seeing these sights I cannot think of them as demons any more, I shall stick to calling them kitsune'

Kyuubi, sensing his discomfort with his new senses, moved to seal them but Naruto shook his head.

"I'm getting used to it, and it feels so good to be able to feel a newborn kit twitch his tails for the first time just by holding out a finger _([I make him sound overpowered for a 5 year old, he'll be fighting Higher Demons and even Celestials at some point])_. Ano, Kyuubi-sensei, why is my voice so deep?"

"**Well, becoming a half-demon made you advance roughly 500 human years, your vocabulary has also been extended largely, as well as your IQ and overall wisdom, though where your wisdom came from I know not. It is possible you absorbed memories from an imprint of my chakra."**

"Can that even happen?"

"**Oh sure, there are at least seven different clans that can tell more or less everything about a person just by touching them and stealing a tiny amount of chakra from her."**

"Interesting. So we came here to train, right? Where do we do that?"

"**Well, up to four tails you can train right here, but five tail and above have to go to the training grounds located... there."** Kyuubi said, punctuating the '**there**' with a sharp jabbing motion to the north. Naruto moved to do the demonic teleportation but was stopped by Kyuubi, who said **"You'll never get used to that body if you don't use it, we're walking."**

"But Kyuubi-chan, it must be 500 miles away!"

"**Oh, that reminds me, you need weights. GAKI!"** The latter sentence was directed to a four-tailed fox lurking nearby, who understandably jumped. **"Could you please go get Kagami-san? I need to borrow her for some sealing."** The kitsune addressed nodded and bounded off in a southerly direction.

Roughly 10 minutes later the kit came bounding back with a powerful looking demon in tow. 'How do I know she's powerful? It must be the Kyuubi's memories.'

"**Okay brat, if this is a prank I am going to have your tails for thi--- _KYUUBI!_ I heard you got sealed by a human! Where have you been these past months?"** These words were spoken by the newcomer, whom Naruto had gathered was named Kagami.

"**I know, it's been years in the mortal realm! I was indeed sealed, that stupid mortal got Shinigami-sama involved. I decided to train the brat since even Nibi got a somewhat strong vessel. Anyway, I need you to work some of your Fuuinjutsu magic on him so he has a nice round.. Let's say 2000 pound weight on all limbs and another 8000 on his torso?"**

"**Ooh, you mean I get to torture a mortal with my bone-carving again? I haven't done that with permission in almost... Why, it must have been a thousand years! Say, whatever happened to D--"**

"**Don't speak of him in my presence, or to Naruto either. How long will your carving take?"**

"**I finished it while you were saying that last sentence."** Indeed she had, she was sheathing what looked to be a very long knife and Naruto was noticeably paler, and flatter. Indeed, he was splayed on the floor praying for the inexplicable weight to be lifted. Instead, he was lifted by Kyuubi and frog-marched to the training field.

* * *

_([A/N I have to cut this off here, it's 1 am and I haven't slept in a week. Next chapter should be nice and long though, I shall detail his entire training up to the seventh year and have some more character building including explaining who D-- is. Kagami is not related in any way to any anime or manga character, I just chose a random Japanese-sounding name.])_


	3. Chapter 3

"**Okay kit, now that we're here there are several things you should know. One: you shouldn't be five tails. Indeed, strength-wise you're barely two. Since you got a power infusion from me, though, I think the gods won't mind if I only drop you to four tails, which I _WILL_ need to do, right now in fact."** Having said this, Kyuubi did 9 demonic hand seals and touched Naruto's farthest right tail, which shot back into his spine. Naruto also turned into a fox, but as he was four tails he still could talk in human.

"**Wh**.. what's the **big** id**ea? Why** am **I talking** like an **animal?**" Naruto was surprised that he still could talk, he didn't know much about kitsune.

"**Well kit, you're only a four-tails kitsune now, so you're talking more like how ravens talk than how humans do. Once you get back up to five-tails you will be able to speak and transform freely. Another thing; this is the most important stage in your kitsune lifetime. In this stage you will choose exactly what kind of fox you will be. I chose to be a red-tailed fox, which are beasts of destruction and carnage, but there are many many other kinds. Green-tailed foxes are most in touch with nature, for example, while blue-tailed foxes are most at power in the water. Silver tails can create matter, while black-tails are beasts of chaos, or void, which can only destroy matter, absorbing enough to create new tails. White foxes are close to celestial, healing and seeding peace all over, but they can't usually make it to nine-tails. There's also the long and difficult path of the golden kitsune, but I don't think you could handle it. Indeed, I think you'd be a spiritual fox, but there have only been about five before. One was the most power fox of all time, the only kitsune powerful enough to reach 12 tails."**

"**What** does being a **spiri**tual **fox** **entail,** **and** I thought **they** only **went** up to **9 tails**?"

"**No, the tails are simply a measurement of power. The more powerful a kitsune is the more tails they have, but it's nearly impossible to get stronger than nine tail's worth. Spiritual foxes have control over the realms and usually fight by blessing or enchanting weaponry. They are very good with sealing and Fuuinjutsu. Stronger foxes also have the ability to make weaponry out of any element, be it earth, water, wind, or even light. They also have excellent control over water and wind, the 'cleansing' elements. They can also heal the soul, which automatically cures any wounds, but only 10-tails and above can do that. Furthermore, they are the best strategists and leaders of all the foxes, except for the psychic foxes who have the ability to remote view the land and possess the enemy leaders which is actually kind of cheating. Dark spiritual foxes can raise the dead to an extent, but that is more the Nibi no Nekomata's realm."**

"**Why** do you **think I** would be a **spiritual** fox?"

"**I don't know kit, I think you have the right determination and desires to be a good one. Not to mention you're already aligned with wind and light, the two elements most commonly seen in spiritual kitsune. You could probably be a wind kitsune, but they're also inherently unstable, which you aren't. Regardless, whatever you learn at this stage will influence what you will become. If you become obsessed with healing, say, you'll become a white-coat. Training the mind and soul more than the body will make you spiritual, which have more of a rainbow coat, which supposedly changes depending on what element you've used last." 'Not to mention Dan was a spiritual kitsune as well... but again he was a traitor and I shouldn't think of him.'**

"So how should I **start** my training, Kyuubi-**sensei?**"

"**However you want, to the west is a library, to the east is a weapon 'shop', but you actually have to forge your own weaponry using fox-fire... That reminds me, breath this in."** Kyuubi said, pulling out what looked to be a pepper grinder. 'This _IS_ a pepper-grinder' Naruto thought with a sneeze. He then understood why Kyuubi wanted him to sneeze, as the ground for 5 feet in front of him was on fire.

"COOL!"

"**Yes. Now go do something, I need to go talk with some higher-ups.**"

* * *

In the Kitsune realm over 3 years had passed and Naruto was still only a 4 tails. 'Kyuubi-sensei, what am I doing wrong?'

"**Kit, you need to choose ONE thing to train and stick with it. Studying everything at random in the library is only going to give you a headache or make you into a special fox, and believe me you do _NOT_ want to be a special fox. They have control over damn near everything and once they get to 7 tails Kami herself comes and executes them. Furthermore, you need to work your way up to the 4 tails' worth of power that you currently have. You're also going to want to get a familiar, not that you strictly NEED one, but they help you get more powerful by holding about half of your power and forcing you to train more to get back to the correct level."**

"Well, everything is just so damn _interesting_, can I be blamed for wanting to learn it all?"

"**I was the same way, but I decided that destruction was really fun. What do you like most so far?"**

"Well, creation is really fun, especially making swords and stuff... Is there a way to make things like animals?"

"**Well, to do that you usually need to go to your own realm, become a special kitsune, or become a dark spiritual kitsune. Dark spirituals can remove souls from living creatures and place them into shells, animating them. All demons 8 tailed and above have their own realm, which they can manipulate however they please, and special kitsune are basically Kami, thus can do whatever they please."**

"And how about a familiar? How would I do that?"

"**Go back to the human realm and make a bond with an animal of some kind. I'd go with a fox since you're a kitsune, but another spiritual went with an angel, and some of the elemental foxes go with animals from their specific element."**

"I'll just stick with a fox. Umm, where are the spiritual fox scrolls again?"

"**Finally decided on something did you?"** Kyuubi pointed the as-yet still kitsune Naruto in the correct direction and he bounded off, perhaps in search of the darker scrolls.

* * *

[another year has passed]

"KYUUBI-NII-CHAN! LOOK!" Naruto came running towards where Kyuubi was training, five tails waggling behind him.

"**Congratulations, it only took four years. It took me almost a century!"**

"And you were riding on my ass... why?"

"**Umm... because I can? Let's go get you a familiar."**

"Fair enough." With that, Naruto did the seals for the demonic teleportation and holding the image of a forest in his mind. He wasn't certain where he'd pop up as he had only done teleportation a few times, but he showed up about 10 miles away from Konoha's city walls. "Kyuubi-sensei, what next?"

**'****Find a fox that has potential.'** Kyuubi had gone back into his stomach because Naruto fell too far away, and Naruto simply left Her there.

"How will I know which one that is?"

**'****Hell if I know, but you've five tails so you should be able to sense it.'**

Naruto went off in search of a fox. After walking around for twenty minutes he noticed there were about 50 foxes following him, one of whom was saying 'WARM ANIKI WAIT UP!', presumably in fox because when he wasn't listening closely it was more 'yip yip whine yip woof'. He halted, shortly thereafter realising that was a bad idea since he was stuck at the bottom of a dog... fox pile. "Would the--" Naruto started, then switched to fox: 'Would the fox who was calling me Aniki please jump on that tree and the rest of you disperse?', the foxes immediately complying. He turned to the fox on the tree and said, again in fox, 'You seem powerful. Would you like to become my familiar?' The fox mulled it over, then asked 'Would I turn into a fire-breathing kitsune?' Naruto relayed this question to Kyuubi, who had since returned to Naruto's body, who replied **"I think it depends on the fox, if he wants to become a kitsune he can but either way he'll far outlive his littermates, possibly outliving even you if he becomes kitsune."** Naruto shortened that to 'Only if you want to, either way you'll live a really long time.' The fox started to nod, then said 'Only if you'll call me Jirou, I hate Hibiki, which my mother gave me.' Naruto laughed, saying that he could call him 'Nuto' if he wanted. He then turned his speech inward, asking Kyuubi how to make Jirou his familiar. **"Simple, either infuse him with your chakra if he doesn't want to be a kitsune or do the same thing I did with you if he does; since you're not a full demon it won't convert him completely but you will have a stronger bond and he should get another two or three tails."**

Naruto asked Jirou which he'd rather; the fox thought it over a bit further and replied 'Kitsune please!' Naruto warned him that it would be more painful but he was glared at, holding out a paw. Naruto grabbed a kunai- one of the ones he made with spiritual fox powers out of ice- and slashed both their hands. Jirou bared his teeth but left his paw hanging, which Naruto held in his own hand, leaking a smaller amount of demonic chakra than Kyuubi did when she converted him. There was a large flash of light and Naruto got a massive headache, which was nothing compared to the pain Jirou looked to be going through. He was on his back, which was arched, the ground becoming completely scorched and steaming, and he was leaking demonic chakra in such amounts even Naruto was slightly worried. Suddenly, a tail shot out of his spine, then another, and Jirou collapsed.

Naruto felt quite a bit weaker, though he was still powerful enough to retain all 5 tails. He picked up Jirou and slung him across his shoulders. Jirou was noticeably larger, while before he was about the length of Naruto's forearm he was now as large as Naruto's entire arm. Inwardly, Naruto was asking Kyuubi where they should travel next. Kyuubi recommended Kirigakure no Kuni, as Naruto was simply _terrible_ with swords which was against his coat colour. _([by the way, spirituals are basically paladin, except different... I'd give a better definition but I can't decide what they really are :S])_

Since he had no idea what to associate Kuni with, he walked around till he found several sleeping ninja- it was nearly 4 in the morning but kitsune are nocturnal- and carefully searched their packs for a map of some sort. The first two he searched had nothing other than various currency and weaponry, which he stole, but the third was apparently the navigator since he had what looked to be every single map ever made in his pack. Naruto grinned a rather toothy grin and sealed them all into a scroll, keeping out the ones showing the land of Fire and the land of Waves. He'd apparently need to set forth in a south westerly fashion and travel that way for what would be about a week for normal ninja, but if he released his seals he could be there in about a day. 'That reminds me, I need to increase the weight on my seals, about 300 pounds on each limb and another 500 on my torso should do it.' After doing as such he hefted Jirou back onto his shoulder and set off towards Kirigakure.

* * *

Jirou woke up roughly 12 hours after he and Naruto bonded. 'WHOA! I grew a ton!' Jirou fox-spoke, looking into a nearby stream. "That's nothing, I grew to this height when I was five because of my Hanyou transformation. You're only quarter or so demon, probably less because I myself was converted rather than born of a full demon and human."

'Wow... that's a lot to gain.'

"Oh hey, do me a favour and sniff this powder." Naruto said, pulling out what looked to be a pepper grinder from one of his inside pockets _([I need to draw Nuto's new outfit; of course, I can't draw...)]_

Jirou did as he was asked, sneezing fire after inhaling a breath's worth of pepper. 'COOL! Is there anything else interesting I should know about being a kitsune?' Jirou asked.

"Well, you're insanely good at illusions now, you should be able to walk into volcanoes without flinching, and when you finally turn human you'll be more or less irresistible in your normal form-- you'll need to do some form of henge or withhold the aura of seduction."

'Aura of seduction, Naru-san?'

"Aye, the most fun part of being a kitsune!"

'Can I ask how it works?'

"Well, you just did. I'll simply say that it's pheromones, and you will have to figure out which on your own. I didn't figure it out until I was about 8... that reminds me." _'Kyuubi-sensei, how old am I now?'_

_**'I think you're about 10 in the human world, kitsune-realm time is kind of strange. Roughly speaking, you should probably head back to your village next year, you need to go to that ninja academy.'**_

_'Well, I need to learn ninpou-arts, don't I? That is why we're going to Kirigakure, right?'_

_**'Yes, kit. When you get there, go into the first blacksmith's you see. Do these seals--'**_ Here, the Kyuubi sent the image of 4 seals into Naruto's mind. **_'Then stick your hand in molten steel. Since you're a spiritual kitsune the metal will follow your thoughts, though you'll need to borrow a bit of my fire kitsune chakra to keep it from solidifying early. This will be the first sword you ever make so its shape should be instinctual, but once you get more powerful you should be able to make a sword however you like, possibly even using them.'_**

_'Kyuubi-sensei, how could I live without your helping?'_

_**'I expect you'd be quite a bit stupider, kit. You'd probably run around shouting 'Dattebayo' and 'BELIEVE IT' all the time, or something, and your best friend would betray you to your worst enemies. That reminds me, you need more friends, maybe even a mate.'**_

_'Yeah, not yet. I'm only 9, Kyuubi-sensei.'_

_**'Stupid humans and their no-mating laws. Anyway, you better head off towards Kiri.

* * *

**([A/N I'm going to leave it off here, I feel terrible for not updating so long. My computer broke and I was lucky enough to recover this bit.])_


	4. Chapter 4

_((HOLY CRAP I'M SORRY. Life's been really shitty lately. I know you don't care, though, so on wit da show))_

* * *

'Sugoi... look at that building!' Jirou was staring in awe at the biggest thing he'd ever seen. "Yeah, there's a lot of buildings like that. Actually, that is a rather small building, some actually go up 70 floors!" Naruto explained. 'Bigger than this? Are you sure, aniki?' "I've seen some! Anyways, we've gotta find a blacksmith or something."

With that, Naruto listened for the telltale sounds of a blacksmith's: iron clanking, furnaces blasting, and men swearing loudly. Of course, the nearest one was still a mile away, but Naruto was rather quick on his feet.

"Good day, Mr Blacksmith. Might I borrow your molten metal?" Naruto queried. As he looked 16 the blacksmith narrowed his eyes but let Naruto in the back regardless. 'Okay, Kyuubi-sensei, what do I do next?' **'Oh for crying out loud, you have the worst memory I've ever heard of. These four seals, stick your hand in the metal. It'll form into your ideal weapon."** 'And this won't burn me... how?' **"Magic."**

Naruto rolled his eyes, then charged up some demonic chakra and did the seals, giving his hands a sinister blue glow. As soon as the tip of his middle finger touched the metal, however, his entire arm, up to the elbow, was sucked into the metal. 'Err, is this normal?' **"No, it's not. Well, let's see where it goes from here!"**, and go it did. When Naruto tried to pull his arm out it just got sucked back with increasing amounts of force, and about three minutes in the metal started penetrating into his skin, travelling along his bones to the spine and, for want of a better word, interfacing with his central nervous system. Suddenly, the metal stopped burning him and started floating, forming letters. "Please... put.. your.. other.. arm.. in.." Naruto read aloud, then, not wanting to anger something so intricately connected to his spine, complied. This time, however, it merely formed to a gauntlet covering his wrist and then stopped. The metal went from a cherry red to a disturbingly cold blue, and he was released. The blacksmith, who'd be overlooking, said "That was by far the strangest thing I've ever seen." Naruto grinned. "Well, I have an affinity for strange things. So since I gave you witness to such a spectacle, can I have the metal I used for free?"

The blacksmith grinned, then said no. Naruto was forced to pay using money not exactly his (remember where we got our maps? Naruto isn't exactly 'moral'.), then exited the smithy's. Thinking he should get familiar with the weapon before he had to use it in battle, he found his way to a clearing with nobody around for about a mile radius. He then lifted his arm and said "Weapon, GO!". Surprisingly, nothing happened. "Err... Weapon, ACTIVATE! Weapon, KILL THE TREE! Weapon--" **'Naruto, isn't it apparant that isn't going to work? From what little I know about penetrating weapons, which isn't much, they're used by sort of... pushing them out. Remember how it went into your spine?"** Naruto was fairly uncertain about it working, but when he shifted his arm again he could feel a new muscle along his forearm. 'Now that's strange, when did I get a tattoo? ... and why is it spelling "JUST USE IT ALREADY" in a very violent manner?' He took in a deep breath, clenched his fist, and pushed the new muscle. In a few short seconds three unusual things happened: a six inch blade shot out of his upper wrist, the blade took some of his chakra and launched it out forcefully, and a tree 30 feet away was hit by a blast of heat and force so powerful it simply ceased to exist in this plane. Jirou, who was standing on a tree well behind Naruto, quite promptly requested Naruto not to pet him any time soon. Naruto noticed a new muscle in his left arm as well, so he pointed the left arm at another tree and pulled. Rather than anything explode-y happening, though, he was pulled into his mind. Well, I say his "mind", it was actually the gauntlet he found himself in. "Ummm... Hello?" Naruto said, quite unsure of himself. A voice began speaking from the walls: _"You are well within your rights to be unsure of yourself, you're the first person in this universe to wield the'_ Here, the voice said something rather unpronouncable. _'It's not easy to say in your language, fine, but back in my plane- which you've rather impolitely bonded yourself to- we have an entire language like that, which by the way is going to be brought into your mind along with 16 millenia of information... NOW'_ Naruto's mind had a very queer sensation, akin to that of 3 civilization's worth of perfected knowledge shoved without his permission into his memory banks. His brain itself had to rewire itself to allow for all the pure data, which caused no small amount of harm to his body: glycerine, sodium, and oxygen levels dropped well beyond critical levels until the knowledge of how to synthesize them found their way into his brainstem. Back in the world Jirou was occupying, Naruto went from standing stock still with a bizarre look on his fact to collapsed on the floor, his eyes attempting to stare at the back of his skull from the inside, his nose releasing about 2 pints of blood, and his skin turning an unhealthy shade of purple, before everything stopped going bad and his body began restructuring itself to maximum efficiency. His muscles grew stronger without much enlargement, his skin adopted a 'perfect' colour and removed all hair, his face became the pure idea of handsomeness, his body no longer needed lungs or a stomach so removed them, as well as some rather large changes to his body structure, including a total of 15 tails. All of this having happened in the frame of about 20 seconds, Jirou was quite shocked. Back with Naruto's consciousness, his personality was having a fist fight with his rational, and obscenely overtaught, side for control of his body. _'Oh, so THAT'S what happens when you give a lower being a bit of intelligence. Neat.'_ Naruto's personality turned to glare at the wall, getting punched in the cheek for his efforts. It fell to the floor, did a backwards somersault to its feet, and leapt directly at the rational thought. _'Okay gentlemen, break it up. Thought, use your technique of merging on the dobe over there. Dobe, stop this kerfuffle at __**ONCE**__.'_ The voice was obviously quite used to getting its way, and Naruto's personality stood swiftly to attention. Rational thought had no emotion but got in a last punch to the gut before merging together to create SUPERNARUTO, Fighter of All That Is Dark. Actually, he just got a big head and no stomach for his troubles, but bah. "So why am I so smart now, exactly?" _'That'd be because of your penchant for shoving your hand in molten metal with very old magik-'_ "It's called chakra!" _'MAGIK. running through it. You SOMEHOW managed to luck across the exact smity's that was located at a crossing of worlds, which was in fact the nexus point to all worlds, with PRECISELY the right spell-'_ "Technique!" _'QUIT INTERRUPTING ME. To allow you access to the Qztlkvgji, which our most wise and powerful are wary of. It's generally the moronic 2000-year-olds who try to use one, being immature, but you and your puny mortal body somehow managed to survive the bonding.'_ "Hey, I'm half demon, is that why?" _'Demon? Oh, is that what the furry thing behind you is? I thought it was a cat or something.'_ Kyubi bristled at being called a 'cat', but wisely said nothing. "So there's no higher reason to me being given access to this incredible amount of power and immortality? I'm not meant to conquer this universe or anything?" _'My word, no. You can come to the Nexus worlds, though, with the Qztlkvgji you've got the same rank as one of our... Lieutenants, and can go more or less anywhere.'_ "Neat. So can I go now?" _'Sure. You know how to use your weapon at least, call on me if you need any help or anything.'_

((_A/N: This is where I give up on writer's block and sate thy appetites for my AMAZING PROSE. Or utter garbage, I barely check through my chapters for spelling and grammar before I send it on to FFnet.))_


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